Trends

I decided it was time to express my other side. Now, before I scare you, let me clarify... There is more to me than just being a mother and wife (although those aspects of my identity are the most important to me.) I have thoughts and opinions about many things and would like to make them more public (mainly so my hubs doesn't have to listen to me ramble on about things he really doesn't care about.) Here goes...

LATEST TRENDS I JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND

1. Leggings and flip flops at church: I like both of these clothing items, and even think they look good together, but not at church. I think it is completely disrespectful to show up to church wearing an outfit that looks like it should've been worn on another day. If you are a convert or investigator, you get a pass. Showing up in the first place is more important than what you wear. Born and raised in the LDS faith and wearing flip flops and leggings? Shame shame..... Show some respect and wear a real shoe and buy skirts/dresses of appropriate length so you don't have to compensate with pants.

2. Walking while texting/gaming/IMing/Surfing the WWW: What in the world are people thinking? Honestly.... This activity is just as dangerous as fartin' around on your phone while driving. You're going to be hit by a car or run over by a bus. You're going to walk into a parked car. You're going to trip over a child or small dog (or big dog.) You're going to smash your face when you walk into a glass window or door. You're going to get a head injury when you walk into a concrete or metal pole. You're going to be smacked by someone opening a door or have your feet run over by a shopping cart. You're going to be yelled at (by me) when you refuse to move up in the check out line at Wal Mart and I'm behind you with my restless children. Please put your phone in your pocket and wait until you're stationary and not in anyone's way to pull it out or don't be surprised when I bust a gut laughing because you walked into a pole...

3. Groups of people sitting around a table using their phones: Whatever happened to organic human interaction? Simply being in someone's presence seems to be enough (or too much) for everyone now. People are too busy checking their emails and texting everyone and tweeting to pay attention to the person sitting 2 feet in front of them. I just think it's sad. Why not save each other the trouble and just say "I'll text u" and don't bother getting together...

4. Kids and electronics: Could someone please explain to me why anyone under the age of, let's say 12 has access to smart phones and tablets? I see children playing with their parents' phones in grocery stores and restaurants, and I suppose it's okay if it's keeping them quiet, but what about the ones who have their own or refuse to find entertainment elsewhere? What about books, toys, or imagination? Yes, I have a few child friendly apps on my ipod, but they are hardly ever used because I want my kids to find other things to occupy their time.

5. The "bumpit" hairstyles: I don't find these hairdos attractive.I have tried. but just can't. I honestly think they look creepy. I wonder what would happen if I went up behind a woman who has a gravity defying 'do and touched it. Would it deflate? Suck me in? Would I stick to it because there's more hairspray holding it in place than there rightfully should be? Would a small animal crawl out or would I have access to the woman's wallet and car keys?

6. Emo/Scene/Whatever: I really don't get why kids these days claim to be so different and original and unique when they look exactly the same. They all wear the tight jeans, black band t-shirts, raccoon makeup and sneakers and then claim they are one of a kind. Is there a machine pumping these kids out and turning them loose because I swear, they're everywhere! Yes, you are so original, now go join the 55869786850338709874521 other kids who look just like you....

7. Brightly colored jeans: No, no, no, no! There are only a few select people who can pull this off, yet most of the time, I see girls who really shouldn't be wearing fushia jeans rockin' them at the grocery store. I'm a big girl with big legs and an equally huge rear end, so naturally, I wouldn't be caught dead in tangerine skinny jeans. I have a problem with neon pants regardless who decides to buy and wear them, but the fuller figured girls need to just walk away (or run) when they see them on the rack. This goes for animal print as well. I realize LMFAO has glorified the animal print pants thing with their very popular song, but here's a tip: Just say no!

8. Furry boots: I can't bring myself to think footwear covered in what appears to be Chewy's fur adorable. In fact, these boots actually scare me a little when I look at them. I think they might start growling or flash some teeth. I'm also 99% sure they smell awful when wet just like a dog.

9. Aforementioned boots paired with shorts or skirts and a puffy coat: This makes no sense to me at all. Wearing a coat and warm shoes does not negate the fact that your legs are bare and most likely frozen. I'm sorry, but I think you just look out of place. Put on a pair of pants or lose the jacket and boots all together and opt for a tank top and flip flops so the rest of your body can freeze right along with your legs and maybe next time you'll remember to get dressed before you leave the house.

10. Shortening words and adding weird endings: Words like "totally" and "whatever" should be reserved only for teenagers, and even then, they're weird to me. Shortening them and adding weird endings turning them into "totes" and "whatev" make everything worse. Not to mention, you sound dumb when you say them.